Vim + Vigor: Day 1

9:24 am: The No. 1 juice isn't bad. I feel pretty good for no caffeine and breakfast on a Monday morning! This  is going to be a walk in the park.

11:00 am: The No. 2 juice is too sour for my taste buds. This bottle is supposed to purify and regulate me? It's gonna take more than a bottle of juice to purify this chick. I'm feeling okay. I should probably stop looking at videos of pasta and Japanese food. Are my trips to the bathroom enough cardio for the day?

12:10 pm: Lunch at my desk with a bottle...and not the good kind. No.3 isn't bad compared to No.2. That second one was tough to finish. Still feeling pretty good!

2:07 pm: No. 4 was delicious! My favorite so far! My desk is a complete mess. Water and juice bottles everywhere. I decided to stop walking to the recycle bin after every bottle. Way too much walking going on today.

3:54 pm: One word. Hunger. I'm already planning my meals once this debauchery is over with. Wait, what was the point of this again? Crap, why is this on my desk?!

5:32 pm: Alright I have my gym clothes on and I'm gonna head to the gym for a quick run and weights. Let me just lie down real quick...

7:59 pm: WTF just happened. I hate falling asleep with my bra and contacts on. Why do I smell bacon downstairs?! I'm starving and all I have are two bottles of juices to look forward to. When is the last time I ate real bacon? How does Gwyneth Paltrow do this?!

9:53 pm: Due to the best nap ever I had to down those two bottles and boy was that difficult! I can't stop staring at the plate of bacon and bag of Cheetos across from me as I drink my dinner alone. Why are those two things even in this house right now?! I can't stop thinking about food. This might have been the hardest hour all day.

10:53 pm: I forced myself into bed to stop me from devouring any food I have downstairs. It's cold and I'm starving. I might as well be homeless on the streets. Homeless on the streets of Dallas, but at least I have my $135.00 bottles of juices and a bangin' bod. Tomorrow might be Hell on earth.